Courtesy for Newly Awakened
Introductory Courtesy for the Outer Bailey
First of all, I would like to warmly welcome you to Her Majesty Queen Vivienne's castle.The ability to wield any influence in this place, whether it be through bearing a sword, learning magic, or any other path, depends upon your ability to impress others with your appropriate behavior.
I hope that this lecture will help you, by alerting you to which behaviors may bring you trouble, and which bring you favor here in the Outer Bailey. The guidelines are not complicated, but may differ from what you know from your pasts.
First of all, wanton violence and amorousness are never appropriate behavior. Violence will be punished by the Winter Watch, so if you do not desire a stay in the dungeon, restrain yourself even when anger overcomes you.
If you find that someone has offended your honor, you may challenge them to a duel, and request a champion if you are not skilled in the sword. But brawling is not appropriate. You should call the Watch if you need defense against violence.
And, as for amorousness, please restrain yourself in that regard as well, and only attempt to embrace those whom have invited such attentions from you. And be aware that you can and should refuse any unwelcome advances. You are under no obligation to accept attentions that you do not appreciate.
In the same vein, you should avoid examining, following, or closely approaching anyone who has not invited such intimacy. Those who do not know you well might interpret such behavior as an act of aggression. This does not mean that you cannot look at anyone, but some newly awakened sers do closely examine every new person they meet, and some seras find this frightening or even threatening.
If you treat others with respect, they will respect you in return, and welcome you more warmly than if you attempt to force your way into their conversations and their lives.
If you enter a room where two or more people are speaking, listen quietly for a moment to learn whether you are interrupting. If they are speaking seriously on some topic, you may need to wait until a better time to ask them something. If someone is weeping uncontrollably or proposing marriage, it may not be a good time to ask them how to join the Gardening Society.
In the same vein, you should never open a closed door without knocking first. If the occupants wish not to be disturbed, they will knock in return, and you should respect their right to privacy. If the door is opened for you, however, or if there is no answer to your knock after a few moments, then you should feel free to enter the room.
In addition to respecting persons, you should also respect their property. If you enter a crowded room to see an object sitting on the table, you should not pick it up to examine it. The owner may take offense. I saw this happen to a Duelist once, when a Newly Awakened ser took her hat from off the table in front of her, and she was most decidedly not pleased. I do not recommend it.
When entering or leaving a room, be sure to render courtesy to any others present. Simply racing from a room without a word is considered impolite. Bowing or curtsying, along with a word of greeting or leave-taking, is preferable.
When others enter a room where you are present, you should also render greeting to them, though bowing or curtsying is not always necessary. A simple nod or smile may do nicely for greeting a new arrival.
As in all things regarding etiquette, however, use your best judgment. At a public lecture, for example, or a poetry recital, it is best to simply allow a new arrival to enter silently, and greet them when the event is done.
When speaking to each other in this castle, we use the word 'ser' as the form of address for men, and 'sera' as the form of address for women. Hence, I am sera Punzel. However, these are only the forms of address for folk with no title. Terms of address for nobility are unfortunately beyond the scope of this lecture. Feel free to contact me (Punzel), though, or read the more complete Inner Bailey etiquette guidelines if you have specific questions.
Those with earned titles should be addressed accordingly, including the Watchpeople of various ranks. But please note that 'Seeker', 'Healer', 'Counselor', 'Initiate', and suchlike are not official titles, but only names by which members of those professions do call themselves. You may wish to use these informal titles when speaking to these folks, especially when interacting with them in their professional capacity, but courtesy does not demand it.
Even among those with no official title, however, some are due high respect. For example, if you attend a sword practice, healing lecture, or magic class, you should respect the authority of the instructor leading the practice or lecture. The same is true of any who do try to help you. They are in no way recompensed for their efforts ... they offer out of the kindness of their hearts. Please show them the respect to which they are due, and you will do well.
Those interested in learning more about etiquette and courtesy, or promoting these gentle arts in the castle, should feel free to attend meetings of the Courtesy Circle on Saturdays at 4 bells in the Lecture Hall.
